I wasn't expecting to see you again... {TAG Sinbad}

He even had to tease him! Like he situation wasn't humiliating enough as it was... Then, as the male quoted an old phrase from their past together, from a night where, due to the alcohol, he had been far wilder than usual, he replied before he could even realize it "Asshole!" He replied by instinct, as he would have replied when they were still together, but he immediately bit his tongue after. Muttering a 'thanks' he took his hand and let Sinbad help him standing up. Following him into the tavern, enjoying the closeness more than he was actually supposed to in such a situation, he took a moment to process what Sinbad had asked him, but he finally nodded. After so long, Sinbad still respected his need of secrecy... He stayed quiet, not having to pretend much to pass for a drunk man, while Sinbad asked for a room. As Sinbad closed the door behind their back, Eric was suddenly hit by the realization of where and with who he was. He never thought something like that could happen again... still helped by the man, he approached the bed and slowly sat down: doing it slowly, though, didn't help much and though he managed not to make any noise he still couldn't hide a grimace.

Sinbad couldn't help but snicker as he got a reaction from the smaller male, raising an eyebrow playfully at the male. "And you'll have to get over it." he snipped back to the male with a cheshire grin. Once they reached the inside of the tavern from the stables, Sinbad spoke to the tavern host for him and his lightweight drunk friend here. He was a bit worried about the male due to his silence throughout their way to the room. As he got them both into the room, he shut the door behind them and locked the door for a slight precaution. Sinbad helped the male over to the bed, watching him as he slowly sat down on the bed. "Sorry...couldn't detain myself back there." Sinbad immediately quipped as he cross his arms over his chest as he spotted the male's grimace. "Couldn't help but get entranced by seeing you again...and getting the chance to hold you again." Sinbad also added, not hiding the fact at all that he truly did miss the male.

Sinbad's words hit him once again and he blushed once more, staring at the floor "Yeah... I noticed..." he just managed to mumble. Gods this was getting uncomfortable again... at least for him, he was almost sure that Sinbad didn't feel uncomfortable anymore after fucking him... but he had never been a talkative one, opening up, even with Sinbad, had always been difficult. Although the guy always managed to make him talk, in the end...

"Of course you noticed. You're feeling it as well." he snarkily remarked in amusement. Sinbad quirked his eyebrow up a bit at the male's mumble, shaking his head a bit at the male's presumably nervousness. He could see that the male seemed uncomfortable as well. It had been three years since the two have seen each other. That was a major factor in the male being uncomfortable. Though Sinbad had to admit that he didn't mind seeing the redness tinting the male's cheeks. Hopefully Sinbad had thought the male would have grown to be more talkative over those years. Guess not really due to the slowly impending silence. Time for some coaxing it seemed. Sinbad was about to plop down on the bed, but remembered about his ass as well. So he simply sat down normally near the headrest, leaning back against it. "Alright time for catch up! So how's the crow been doing so far these three years?" Sinbad commented out, crossing his arms behind his head as he leaned back again, glancing over at Eric.

He blushed if possible even more at the male's comment, but couldn't deny it was true. As always, Sinbad got him without need of words. Did really three years passed? It felt so weird... on one side it looked like they had never been separated, on the other though, if felt like they hadn't seen each other in centuries... At his question he evaluated the possible answer, thinking even of the possibility to lie... but Sinbad would never buy a lie, he would get on his own that he had gone through hell during those past years... In the end, he opted for honesty: “I did spent more time staring over the wall and thinking to just throw myself down… well, you know, more than it’s considered normal in the watch” he tried to joke about it, shrugging, but it wasn’t a lie: he had thought so many times of just get it over with life... So many times, while fighting with wildlings and such, he has actually wondered if it wasn't better to just le them kill him...

Sinbad froze in his position on the bed, staring over at the male after what he had just tried to make as a joke. He had heard that a couple of night watch guys had committed suicide before. And even tried to run and leave the wall behind. A few of them succeeded, while others just got executed by getting beheaded. "Shit...Eric..." he murmured, wandering what was going on in that mind of his ex-lover. That thought of just stealing this man away to Essos was tempting him so badly right now. Especially to get rid of those kind of thoughts that seemed to be clouding Eric's mind. "You can't be serious...You shouldn't be saying shit like that, Eric." Sinbad commented towards the other male as he sat up more, alert. Sue he had asked how the male's been for these past three years, but didn't expect something like that. It pissed him off that the male would think thoughts such as those. Those thoughts didn't only affect him. It affected Sinbad also! What would he do if Eric decided to make those thoughts become true? How would Sinbad even know if Eric was alive still after hearing such? Sure Sinbad had been in the dark ever since Eric's rejection. But to hear that the male was having such dark thoughts really worried him, especially when the male leaves. Sinbad pushed back the thought of the male leaving so soon, not wanting to think about that just now.

He didn't expect Sinbad to react like that, but after all he never really understood his worries about him. It wasn't such a big deal, at least in his eyes. And after all, he didn't do it in the end... though in his mind formed the thought that jumping off the wall would be more tempting than ever once he had to leave... He decided not to think about that, at least for now. "I's not like the wildlings would miss me..." he replied with an apologetic smile, shrugging, still trying to joke "Nor the crows... frankly I think my family would be happy, they could pretend I was some sort of hero..." he shrugged again, like he didn't care much. He actually was just used to, accepting it as a truth he couldn't fight. "So... what about you?"

Sinbad's eyebrow twitched a bit at the male's little joke about the wildings, dismissing his apologetic smile. Now he couldn't get the male's earlier remarks out of his mind now even if the male was trying to joke. He scowled darkly, glancing away from the male. His eyes full of anger at the mention of the male's family, who Sinbad wished would sod off into oblivion. The male was in the nights watch just because they trusted some female rather than Eric, their own son. None of these families knew what their sons and daughters were doing. Look at the Lannister family in the past, it took some time Sinbad bested when Tywin Lannister figured about his son and daughter sleeping together but probably kept that secret to himself to save face. Sinbad didn't know the female that Eric screw, but he could guess that she might have had thrown Eric to the hounds as a scrapegoat to keep her other lover safe most likely. That case was usually the most common. "Being a hero for throwing yourself off the wall, just so your family can finally live in peace that there isn't a burden in the family anymore?" Sinbad scowled harshly, rolling his eyes as he frowned deeply.

He glanced back over at the male as Eric asked about him, sighing heavily. "Well my brother is continuing to be a pain in the ass. Especially since he's now the new head of the Greyjoy house." Sinbad replied to Eric's question, shrugging his shoulders lightly. "He's struggling to get me to end my ways such as traveling, drinking, getting into trouble. Just to save face for the Greyjoy house." Sinbad scoffed in annoyance. Their name had already been disgraced by both his mother, uncle, and grandfather. Many things would've happened differently if his grandfather had chosen to get his son back from the starks.

Eric moved uncomfortably at Sinbad's remark, lowering his eyes at his angered expression. He never liked when Sinbad talked about his family, but he had given up a long time ago defending them from his accusation. After all, deep down, he sourly agreed with him...
He was slightly relieved when he subject changed, and even though he understood it was a serious matter he couldn't help but chuckle "Good luck with that..." there was no way the older Greyjoy could actually manage to stop Sinbad. He envied him for that, he wish he could stand up for himself like that... but that just wasn't him.
"So... what beside that?" he asked a little after, trying to hide the need that was growing into him to know if he had suffered as he did. Did he miss him? How much? For how long? Did he get over him? Did he find someone new? He tried to act casually, but he feared that his interest would be clear to SInbad...

The corner of Sinbad's lips twitched up a bit into a small smile at the male's comment. He chuckled lightly, nodding his head a bit. "We both know that's never going to happen." Sinbad snickered, knowing that his brother was going to fail horribly at doing so. When his first attempt had failed, Sinbad knew that his brother wasn't up to reforming the reckless middle Greyjoy. So he really wished that Naveen would just give it a rest already and quit giving him those disapproving glares. Where was the brother that went to the tavern with him and joked around? Sinbad missed that past brother of his.
Sinbad glanced down at his legs at the male's question, tilting his head to the side as he thought about the male's question. Then returned his gaze back onto the male. "Easy to read as always," Sinbad murmured softly with a small half smile. "Well here's an interesting snippet to your question. I drowned in my sorrows over your rejection in Dorne. And wondered during these three years if you were alive or not." Sinbad grumbled out with no hesitation as his eyes bore into Eric.

Eric could feel a weird mix of feelings exploding into his chest: he was quite embarrassed the male got his thoughts so easily, but it was worth it in the end to receive an answer; he felt sadness and guiltiness at his words, knowing to have caused pain to him was horrifying but he had to bite his lower lip to hide a small smile that was spontaneously forming on his face. He felt somehow flattered by that: no matter how Sinbad kept saying how much he cared for him, he had always found it a bit hard to believe and was always quite pleasantly surprised when the other male showed his affection. "I'm... I'm sorry..." he stuttered, shifting slightly on the bed, causing a new sting of pain in his sore ass. That was a supid thing to say, but he couldn't really think of any smart remark and at least he was being honest "I... I didn't mean... didn't want you to go through that..." he didn't really think he would either... even if Sinbad loved back then, he had less problems than he did in making 'new friends', beside, Eric's low-self esteem and self loathing made it difficult to him understanding that a person could really actually care for him. After all, the family who was supposed and said that loved him had no regrets sending him away and it took years to hear again from them...

Sinbad tilted his head a bit as he noticed the male biting his lip, furrowing his eyebrows at the action. But nonetheless dismissed it. He breathed out heavily as he glanced away from the male, shaking his head lightly. Should he take the male’s apology at all really? Soma would probably have a temper tantrum if Sinbad did forgive the male. But at the male’s next comment, Sinbad’s tense shoulders relaxed a bit slightly. He side glanced over the male with a small grimace. “Let me guess you didn’t think I would’ve gone through something like that?” Sinbad scowled out in annoyance, bringing out one arm and rubbing at his forehead lightly. “Well you were wrong,” he muttered as he brought his hand up and pulled that hat off of his head.

Easy to read as always, Eric stared at the floor before replying to Sinbad's question in a whisper "No, I didn't..." It was really difficult for him realizing that people could actually care for him, even that Sinbad could... it wasn't like he lacked trust into Sinbad, at least that wasn't his intention: as always, the problem wasn't about other people, it was just him... "Didn't think you could miss me much..." he didn't manage to look at Sinbad while saying so, he had a feeling the guy could get angry for his words... but that could even be his last chance to speak with the other guy, and if that was so... he wanted at least to say the whole truth. No matter how hard it was...

Sinbad gritted his teeth tightly as he quickly glared over at the male intensely. "Are you seriously saying that?..." SInbad knew that the male had some trust issues but Sinbad thought that he had at least gotten the male to trust him. He guessed wrong then by the male's recent remarks of not thinking that Sinbad would miss him. Sinbad groaned in annoyance at the thought, trying to wrap his head around it. "You are such an idiot." he grunted darkly before reaching out and gripping the back of the male's collar, pulling him down onto the bed, the male's upper body landing in Sinbad's lap. Dark blue stared down at Eric, full of anger and puzzlement. "Of course I missed you. Why wouldn't I miss the idiot that I had fell in love with..." Sinbad grumbled in a steady tone, after a semi long pause of silence between the males.

As he guessed, his answer angered the man: as always, knowing he was disappointing someone made him uncomfortable, but if that was the last chance to talk to him then he wouldn't hide the truth... He felt a sting of shame mixed with tenderness as Sinbad called him an idiot... if almost felt like when, back in the days they were still together, they got to talk after a big fight... but this time Eric didn't dare to hope that they could solve the situation as easily as in the past... His thought were interrupted when Sinbad pulled him down: the movement hurt once more his already sore ass but he bet Sinbad didn't care, he probably would consider it a well deserved punishment. As he landed in Sinbad's lap he found himself staring into Sinbad's eyes, they were mesmerizing, he just couldn't look away... but he did, blushing, as soon as the guy expressed how much he had loved him... did he still, though? Eric was scared to ask, fearing the answer... "Then why didn't you come?" he asked before he realized it wasn't a wise nor fair question: Eric left him, he had no right to ask the other man to do anything... beside, Sinbad could reply why he didn't reach him instead... but Eric thought he was doing the right thing... he did the right thing... even more, what if he found him with someone else? What if he found out SInbad could actually forget him easily... he wanted the guy to do so, he wanted him to be happy, to find someone more deserving than him... but he just didn't want to see that, he knew that something like that would have definitely killed him... He looked away, uncomfortable and embarrassed, but he wasn't able to move away from Sinbad's lap, he simply didn't want to...

Sinbad's eyebrow furrowed a bit at the male's question as he stared down at the male. There was that blush once again, he noticed as the male looked away quickly. But that question. It was unfair of the male to even ask such a question of him. "Why did I have to? You rejected me...and I believed that you were going to come back to me. But I was wrong on that part." Sinbad growled, looking up and away from Eric. He thought for sue that the smaller male would try to get out of his lap, but didn't move an inch. Sinbad was a bit pleased with this prospect, since his anger would've only increased if the male tried to get up away from him again. "And what if I did come to the wall to see you? Wouldn't that have caused you trouble with the night's watch suspicion?" To have Eric punished due to Sinbad's selfish actions would terribly ruin him. Although the Greyjoy male had almost gone up to the wall when Eric didn't return to their monthly meeting. But he decided against it after being dragged to Dorne by Soma.

Eric shifted again uncomfortable on the bed, but still he didn't leave Sinbad's lap. Even if he thought he should have, he just refused too: he had dreamed for too long to stay so close to the guy once more. Sinbad's words made him feel terribly guilty "I thought I was doing the right thing..." he muttered lowly, without even realizing he had slipped that 'though' in the phrase... cause he could try to deny it in front of the other male, but he wasn't so sure anymore he actually did the right thing... and yes, if he would have come he would have had a lot of problems, so much to explain, but... "I don't care... I wouldn't have... I missed you too much..." he said that moving his arm so that it would cove his face... he wasn't brave enough to say that looking at him, but he hd to say it "Every day has been a nightmare since... since I..." he couldn't even finish the phrase, but he had already been far more talkative and open and honest with his feeling than he usually were...

"Well you were wrong again." Sinbad scowled as he felt the male shifted a bit, glancing back down at the male. So wrong. They had both been affected by the male's rejection with sour consequences. The other male had freaking suicidal thoughts for petes sake. He bit his lip harshly before chewing at it a bit in irritation before he stilled at the male's next comment. "You're kidding me right? I thought you were afraid to have us found out?!" Sinbad quickly interjected, ignoring as the male had covered his face from Sinbad. The male growled lowly in anger as he reached out and gripped the Eric's wrist, pulling his arm away from hiding his face. "Don't you dare hide." He muttered under his breath, his frown slowly turning into a grimace at the nightmare remark. ".....Since you rejected me huh?" Sinbad finished the male's sentence after a long pause.

As Sinbad forcefully removed his arms, pulling it over his head so to free his face, Eric blushed even more, looking at him with the same expression that a puppy would have after his master found out he did something wrong. Yes. Yes he was afraid, terribly afraid, afraid of loosing the little respect and affection his family still had for him, afraid of dishonoring his name, afraid of being seen as weak... he would have probably freaked out seeing Sinbad at the wall... but... truth was... if what he did was the right thing... than maybe being wrong wasn't such a bad thing after all...
He couldn't bring himself to reply to Sinbad's last question, he instead just nodded, looking away. He bit his lower lip before, after a pause, he murmured "Sinbad...what now?" he didn't want to ask, to push the guy, to even find out that that was actually the last time they would meet... but he had felt the urge to ask, to know, for a while and now he just couldn't push this urge anymore...

Sinbad had to bite his lip a bit more, glancing away from the male's puppy look. "Quit with that expression. Or your ass will be sorer than it is right now." he remarked quickly with no hesitation. And he was true to his word. It didn't even matter if the male begged him not to if he keeps that face up. Sinbad wasn't in the mood of dealing with such an adorable, yet saddening expression. "Dammit," Sinbad grumbled under his breath as he kept his grip upon the male's wrist.
His gaze flickered at the male's question, and for once Sinbad was lost for words. What now? He had the male right here in his lap. All he had to do was just pick him up, get them out of this tavern, and onto a ship to Essos. But on the other hand, did Sinbad really want to deal with another rejection from the male? It was all so complicated. "That depends on the person who ended in the first place." he replied in a blank tone, glancing away.

Sinbad's words made him open wide his eyes, but he couldn't blush any more, his cheeks were already on fire, he could actually feel his face burning. He swallowed, looking away from Sinbad: so much for his promise... although he had to admit that, even if his ass was so sore, after their little break the prospect of sharing some more intimacy had is appeal... he bit his lower lip again, trying to deviate his thought, especially fearing that Sinbad could read them easily. He knew he would have already problems getting on a horse as he was, and he couldn't afford too much delay in getting back to the wall.
As Sinbad replied blankly to his question, he felt his heart starting beating wildly: he didn't say no... he didn't say he wasn't interested anymore... he...
"It was up to me last time... and I don't think I managed to take such a good decision as I thought..." he was evidently feeling guilty and, without even realizing it, he went back to the puppy expression "I think it should be up to you now..."

Damn, why must this male look so adorable with that blushing face of his. Sinbad thought to himself, watching in amusement as the male just looked away from him in embarrassment. How in the world can he be so arousing in this tense situation? Though Sinbad didn't really mind it much, although he had bite urge back his sexual needs down. He had only came once during there little reunion back there, while the other had cum three times he believed. So of course he still had alot of energy still.
"And...how will I know that you won't reject me later down the road once again?" Sinbad murmured, his gaze boring down at the other male. His eyes narrowed at the sight of the expression appearing once again, his free hand quickly reached out and cupped the male down there. "Warnings are meant to be taken seriously." he growled in a warning tone, trying to fight back his sexual urge. He wanted to male's company again in more ways than one. Though there were a few complications though.

At Sinbad's question his expression saddened: he couldn't know... cause he knew that getting back with Sinbad was wrong, it was a mistake... but why, then, did it feel so right?
"Cause if I'd be so stupid to reject you then the next step would be a jump off the wall for sure..." he finally managed to muttered bitterly, knowing he was speaking the truth, but knowing as well Sinbad wouldn't like his answer. His expression, though, had to change, when Sinbad moved to cup his private parts. He moved, moaning in surprise, but his surprise turned into pain when the sudden movement hurt again his ass, reminding him why it surely wasn't a good idea... "You promised..." he muttered back to him

Sinbad grimaced a bit at the male's sudden saddening expression, wondering if he had been right to ask such a question. His eyes widened at the male's bitter reply, his head quickly shaking. "Dammit, Eric. Why are you so harsh on yourself so much?" Sinbad cursed under his breath, glaring down at the smaller male. He wasn't liking that his ex-lover kept speaking about himself jumping off the wall. "I want to know that I can trust you..." he muttered, wishing that he could know if there would be rejection in his future if he did get back with the lovely male. And wondered if he was going to have to live in secrecy again. All he wanted to do was be in the male's company and show him affection in public places, like a true lover. Not one who just meets their lover in secrecy every month before one of them had to leave shortly.
Sinbad quirked an eyebrow, snickering a bit at hearing the male's mutter. "Of course I promised. There are other ways of pleasuring one another without fucking you." Sinbad remarked to the male with a dark smirk.

As suspected, Sinbad didn't like his remark. And then he talked about trust... Trust... how could he prove to Sinbad he could trust him? He didn't even trust himself! He only knew he wanted to be with him again, he knew that he would break if Sinbad rejected him now, but what could he do to make himself trustworthy? And wouldn't that be cheating, faking to be something he was not?
At Sinbad's remark on how they could have other ways to enjoy each other company, he bit his lower lip, embarrassed as heck, but managed to murmur "That I could do..." beside... in this way they could skip the subject... at least for now