Nanny's funeral

Since his early childhood, Eric couldn’t remember spending much time with his mother or his father. It always felt like spending time with them was some sort of official matter… sure, he was with them at every meal, but even that felt like a duty he had to attend, like a test he had to pass. To Eric his parents were those two distant people whose love he kept trying to win, that he kept trying to please, but he kept failing.
It didn’t look like his brothers had the same problems he had. Both of them, after all, were obedient, quiet children. He did try to emulate them, to pay attention to the masters, to put his mind into study, to stay quiet and calm… but this just wasn’t him! He liked playing around, he liked sweets and stealing them from the kitchen, he liked climbing on the trees and swimming in the pond, wetting and soiling his clothes…
His parents didn’t approve, of course, and therefore his brothers didn’t approve. There was one person, though, that didn’t judge him or criticize him for just being a lively child: the old nanny Bess, that everyone just called nanny.
Nanny had been a mother to Eric more than his real mother had, and he loved her as such if not even more. The old nanny had a soft spot for Eric as well, and she made no mystery of that: she often covered for him when he skipped a lesson or stole a cake, and tried to protect him when he got caught.
And when Eric had been given a sword master, three years before, she had been there to support him, and to wipe his tears when the master forced him to start cutting himself to win over his fears. Nanny couldn’t protect him from this new master, but at least she was there, Eric could curl up on her lap like when he was a child and feel loved and protected. She hugged him often, a thing that Eric loved and that he needed as well: he craved for physical contact, for love, but his mother nor his father ever hugged him.

And now… now he felt like loneliness would swallow him.
He was standing in front of Nanny’s body, that was resting in the sept surrounded by flowers. He was trying to stop the tears but he just couldn’t. This hurt more than the cuts he had to inflict to himself, more than the bruises his master left him during the training, he just couldn’t think of something that could hurt him more than such a loss.
“Stop crying, you’re embarrassing yourself.” as his father scolded him, he tried to wipe the tears from his face, but he didn’t mange to stop crying, much to his father’s annoyance.
“The funeral is starting soon, just go get dressed.” his father continued in the same disappointed tone before he left
Eric gave up fighting the tears as his father left, after a short while he moved two steps toward Nanny and put a white Lily in her hands, her favorite flower. Then he run away.

Later, when the funeral started, Eric was nowhere to be seen, much to his father’s disapproval and his mother’s disappointment.
It was only after the ceremony was over that Tycho could leave the rest of the family and go look for his brother: he knew how much he cared for the old nanny and not showing up at her funeral… that was just unacceptable!
Now, he was his older brother and he felt like it was his duty to demand an explanation from Eric. Beside, mother and father were looking for him and the more Eric made them wait, the angrier they’d get.
His parents nor the servants had an idea where Eric could be, Tycho, though, had a pretty good idea where he could be. In fact, as he had predicted, Eric was hiding in the stables, where hey kept the hay. He was sitting on the ground, his legs held to his chest and his head resting on his knees, his body shaking because of the sobs.
“Mother and father are looking for you.”
As Tycho spoke up, approaching him, Eric jerked in surprise, startled by his brother. He tried to hide the tears, but it was no use
“Stop crying or you’ll anger father even more.” Father was never pleased with Eric’s tears: he had alway been such a whiney kid, and even if things had started getting better father would still be upset if he saw him crying.
“I-I can’t…” Eric replied trying to repress the sobs, drying the tears, but it was pointless since new one fell to wet his cheeks.
“Don’t be ridiculous! If you cared so much you should have come to the funeral! Why weren’t you with us?”
Tycho’s anger surely didn’t help with Eric’s mood, feeling attached now that he felt lonelier than ever just made him feel worse.
“I-I couldn’t s-stop c-c-crying… F-father would have b-been m-mad…” He stuttered in the end between the sobs.
Tycho shook his head sighing “You just made it worse…” he said forcing him to stand up, they had to go back. Tycho was still upset, Eric’s bad attitude reflected on the whole family, but his annoyance turned in dismay when, as soon as Eric stood up, he wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tight and hiding his face against Tycho’s chest. Tycho could feel Eric’s tears wet his shirt, and his brother was clinging to him like his life depended on it. He was suddenly hit by how desperate his brother looked in that moment.
He and Eric didn’t share a deep bond, he couldn’t even recall the last time they had touched each other, but Eric was his brother and he loved him, no matter how angry he could get at him. With tenderness he hugged him back, gently rubbing his back.
“I-I m-miss her…” Eric stuttered under his breath
“Crying won’t bring her back, Eric” he mildly scolded him, but his tone was soft and he was still gently rubbing his back “And I’m sure she wouldn’t have wanted to see you crying, am I right?” Eric had to now nod.
Tycho gently pushed him away, recovering a handchief from his pocket and drying himself his brother’s tears “Then be strong. She wanted you to be happy, so stop crying. You’ll be ok, you still have us.”
Eric had been crying for hours now and finally it looked like he had cried all his tears. He nodded to his brother, looking sheepishly at him while stepping away.
“Come on now, let’s go back.”
Eric followed Tycho back to the castle, father and mother were furious and Eric was harshly punished, and also sent to bed without dinner.
That night Tycho made one of the few infractions of the castle rules he had made in his life, sneaking in the kitchen and stealing a couple of Eric's favorite cakes for his brother.